I just fake ate dinner

it wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. I chewed on a lot of fried chicken but I never swallowed. I did swallow about six tablespoons of split pea soup. it was liquidy. it reminded me of my veggie juices. I also had to chew on a lot of 'salad' honestly idk what you call lettuce drenching in bleu cheese dressing. I swallowed like 2 leaves.

im gonna say I ate about 300cals today total.

120-apple juice
0-green iced tea
180-fake eating dinner.

im kinda pissed that I had to do this but im not devastated. I guess cause I know if tomorrow I don't see what I wanna see on the scale im just gonna start fasting again until I do. also during the week its soo much easier to get away with not eating.

im disappointed but im not devastated. I didn't lose control. my stomach still feels empty but my mouth feels violated. lol. wasn't supposed to sound so sexual. but it does. my mouth feels like a vacuum bag. all these specks and bits of food. unwanted food. hope all of you are doing better.


think thinn



like kate moss in the 90s getting loved on by johnny depp thin. not fake eating dinner thin.